holiday

Just Another New Years-Mayhem!

 

I hope everyone had a great year and celebrated like a champ. I was destinated and could not take part in this years festivities. Still to reflect back on a year of what my wife tells me ” Still above the ground”, I would have to agree with her. I recall one New Years celebration where I was handed one of those horns that blow out a snake. Well instead of blowing I sucked on it and the darn tube sucked right through the mouthpiece and got caught in my throat. I started gagging and everyone thought I was joking around. Me? Joke around! I was having a spasm like no other and was trying to heave the paper out of my throat when Melinda Parsons, My six grade teacher recognized the immediate danger I was in. WHACK! She hit me on the back so hard I almost passed gas. That clog of paper came out and fell into Jonathan Wilburs whiskey he had over there on the table. He stood up and was pissed like no other and came running toward me, like it was my fault. I was still gagging and saliva was pouring out of my mouth when Jonathan Wilbur started hollering at me so loud his teeth fell out and hit the floor, shattering into a gazillion pieces. The dance floor was littered with tooth fragments and I started hearing loud thumping sounds. The dancing people from the party were falling down, tripping on the white pebbles of teeth, falling hard to the ground. Someone called 911 because it was becoming a disaster in the place. Someone had to triage all the fallen victims. I had a little first aid in Mrs Grace’s 8th grade class so I started going to people who really looked bad. One couple did a split and I could tell that their hips were pointing in different directions, just not normal to look at. I got down on my knee and this is when a piece of tooth penertrated my patella. My kneecap was laserated right there and blood started flowing freely. Richard Millagan started wiping up the mess with his hanky. I could hear sirens in the distance so I was feeling a little better about some more qualified people coming in for the patch job. The cops, all one of them who was on duty couldn’t calm everything that was going on that night. He called for backup. Mutual aid from another town came with a response, one other officer. People were now getting up from the floor, drunkin individuals, you know who you are! begun yelling at the cops. I just tried to stay on the ground making myself a patient, faking how bad I really was even though i had some blood running on the floor. Well before long it was New Years and everyone there wanted their money back because the fun was taking right out of them, I cant say I blame them. One thing for sure is today marks the start of another year, Yahoo! We made it, (STILL ABOVE THE GROUND) Happy New Years. First story of the New Years, D.H.Bilodeau 2016

 

 

Christmas Age Calculation

tree xmas

 

I base my age on how many Christmas events I have been through. I can remember mom and dad holding us twins in their arms so we could see the lights on the tree. I remember the years my brothers, two older than my twin and I, were getting matchbox cars and us twins only received a plastic toy which made noises. I remember going out with our dad, trucking through the snow to find a spruce or fir. Those days were so hard.

My memory brings me to the time my mother made meat pies for Xmas and I got sick after eating it. I also remember the time my twin and I got Rock-em-sock-em Robots. Boy did we have fun with that. I remember my brother and I receiving baseball gloves from Wilsons Store, the tag still left on them. I recall the Christmas Mom told dad that she couldn’t truck out through the snow anymore, it was getting to be too much for her. Time is changing and I’m doing calculations of my own age.

I must be in my teen years, well my twin too. There is the year that the new tree comes in. There is no smell to the tree. The siblings and I, start touching the tree. The tree kind of looks real but has no smell. Interesting concept, fake Christmas. The gifts are unwrapped this year and my brothers and I received some matching pajamas.

My Dad this year tells mom he is going out to get a real tree this year. The boys all jump in the International Scout we have. My Dad drives up the road and pulls into “Dons Xmas Tree Farm”. The boys and I are not that excited about getting a tree from a farm. This is the first time I noticed that Dad is getting older. The tree hauling is just getting to be too much for him.

Another few years go by and a few meat pies and homemade candy. My oldest brother is now an adult. My age is calculating to be in my late teens. I have realized by this point that all I have to do is look back, dwell upon, checking every Christmas event and I can find my age. I since have dropped my regular birth date because it hasn’t been a good reminder. I wanted really happy moments and Xmas was a good reminder of time.

My mother and father set the tree up again. One sibling is in California and one is in Minnesota. It is only my twin brother and I this year. Mom tells us it is ok not to wear our matching pajama’s this Christmas. Time sure is flying and a lot of tree setup’s for my dad. Mom cannot help with the tree anymore with her being lame all the time.  No meat pies this year or homemade candy.

This year my folks tell us they are moving to Florida in the winter. I’m thinking what no Christmas with us? I was devastated by this announcement but I fully understand. Time is changing, people are aging. I know my age is calculating out to be and adult now. My brothers and I meet back again at the house, our parents are not present. My oldest brother mention’s to the rest of us about going out and cutting down a real tree. We all agreed with his thought. We made it happen and all of us siblings enjoyed the scent of a real tree.

I know my age is getting older, I have children of my own. They are calculating their own age. This program has now been set in motion for all my children’s children. Mom and Dad are not coming home anymore. They have set their own time zone and marked their own calendar’s of life. I have marked my own this year. I started making meat pies now for my own children, candy to be bought. I know the rock-em-sock-em Robots are long tucked away in some open landfill, between tires and old junk cars, at the bottom of the pile.

I am told this year that we have grandchildren to be happy for. I now have a reason to move on with this cycle of life. I will start this week to train the young ones of this new calculation of age. I look back at this great life of mine and know that many Christmases have been etched into my memory bank. I can be happy that I have been witness to a wonderful holiday. I’m very thankful to have family to carry on. I’m glad I don’t have to go out and cut down Christmas trees anymore, electing for a fake one. The smell of the real tree is gone. My son tells me he is going out to cut down a real tree for his own house this season. I know my age is calculating, clicking away, I’m marking the calendar.

D.H.Bilodeau 2015