East African Airline Decent

man jail

The pilot Andrew was fumbling with something in his right pocket. I looked over at him and wondered what his real story was . Here was a man in his mid forty’s who never had any family and just pilots around the world. He has no other ambition to do anything else. Flying has overcome him in everyway. I spoke up, Hey Andrew? He turns his head in my direction, You ever been with a woman? I asked. Here he goes again fumbling in his pocket. It happened too quick, Andrew pulled out a bottle of something and sprayed it into my eyes. I started to gag, cough, and was feeling very dizzy. I did the only thing at the moment I could think of. I pushed the levers on the steering and put the plane into a nose dive.

Sounds of people talking, I’m inside some kind of hospital and everyone is speaking a different language than I’m used to hearing. It is not common to hear other languages in different hubs. I am being wheeled around on a gurney of some sort to a different location. I cannot speak, only open my eyes, listening to maybe an answer of my whereabouts. I coughed, oh no, attention to me has been noticed. A woman of East African decent is looking at me with those big brown eyes. Sir, You must lay still! She has demanded me. I will let you know what is going on in a minute, You must be understanding Sir. I give her a  nod in acknowledgement. I’m waiting now inside a small room with bright lights and have to urinate so bad. My arms and legs have shackles on them so it is impossible to move. The woman comes back inside the room and comes to my side. Sir, I’m sorry to report that the plane you were riding in has crashed into our country. Many people, some with babies inside have died because of your equipment failures and for this we have to hold you accountable for your actions. I want to explain what happened if I may. Sir, Your time will come when you meet the City Council, your fate will be worked out there.

I am now in a cell in an East African country. My cell mate is from England. His name is Edward and he was in Africa with his family on vacation. He is coughing real bad and vomiting all the time. Edward, why are you so sick? Has it been something you ate. You have been sick for over two weeks now and should have been better by now. Edward responds, I think I have Ebola. What the heck is that Edward? It is a deadly virus and now you have been in contact. It would be better if you took your life now, there is now cure for this virus. I could tell I didn’t want this virus and I was going to stay real far away from Edward. Time went on and Edward passed only a few days after our conversation. I still have not come down with the disease.

I’m now getting out of my comfy chair in the living room, I look out and both of our children and their loved ones are sitting around the living room. I can smell the remnants of the annual turkey. I must have fallen asleep. Happy Thanksgiving day folks, I’m going to enjoy just being around family.

Bilodeau,D.H. 2014


The Succulent Fiddleheads



The Fiddlehead is a type of fern that grows along the banks of rivers and streams. A succulent species for any dinner plate. This is a type of fern and locals around here go crazy gathering them to make a little profit. I have personally gone out and gathered them myself but noticed that my special top secret patch had been gone over, someone sniped my patch.

There is nothing like the taste of a fiddlehead and my personally best way to eat these ferns is sauté with butter and salt and pepper. Some people like to pickle them or just process them for later use. I have tried to freeze them before but they just are not the same as freshly cooked. You can also cook them with salt pork or bacon. I also like them cooked with Italian Seasons salad dressing mix. There is really a big hype about these ferns around here. They really are not hard to identify but someone would confuse them with a regular fern. fernfiddlehead1

A regular fern does have the signature curled up leaves but will have a lot of fuzz all over the stock. The fiddlehead looks pretty much the same but with a dark green, shiny stock, with no fuzz. I cannot wait to have my supplier of the fiddleheads give us a call. How much do you want this year? We usually buy them these days because I really hate gathering them today with all the ticks in the forest and fields. We usually will get about five pounds or more all processed. What I mean by processed is the fact that the fern also has a skin that has to be removed. One method I have used in the past is to take an old screen from one of your windows and put the fiddlehead on the top. Take a fairly windy day and keep moving the screen up and down letting the wind take away the skin. Also to use a garden hose and wash them through the screen. Continue this process a few times and the fiddleheads will be nice and clean. These people are inline for their fiddleheads, I saw them down the street. gather

I cannot wait to get our fiddleheads, the call should be coming soon.

©Bilodeau,D.H. 2014

Ice-Cream Man



Where did that ice-cream truck go? I can hear the music playing coming down the street. The kids in the neighborhood and I are now running toward the ice-cream truck. Ding Ding a Ling, here it comes. The lights are flashing and my mouth is already watering. I cannot keep up with the big kids running and they are kicking up dust in my face. I have on my mind an ice-cream sandwich. You know the one with two chocolate cookies, rectangular in shape with ice-cream in the middle. I love it when the ice-cream gets real soft and starts to dribble down the edges. I’m coming boys and girls and don’t buy all the ice-cream sandwiches. I finally arrived at the window and the man in the truck looks at me and states. Hey squirt, what will it be for ya? Being  a wise ass young man I replied a poop sandwich. Oh, the look on that guys face when an eight year old boy is being a wise ass. Well he deserved it for calling me a squirt, right?

I will never forget this. Words do hurt people, look at me now I’m writing today about this man that called me a squirt and I’m in my fifties. Words do have an impact on your imagination for life. Remember, sticks and stones can break your bones but words will never hurt you. Well, I totally disagree with this statement. Children are being affected everyday by hurtful words. Kids are being bullied in grade schools and this can be real hurtful to a young lad who will never forget. Schools today are taking steps in the right direction about bullying and rightfully so. I just wish that the ice-cream man never made that comment about me being a squirt, I made a comment back to him that today I wish I never said. One thing to remember and I try to stick to this in my life today. Two wrongs do not make a right. If we all make sure to keep our mouths shut, or keep a tight lip, then maybe children will not be resentful later in life.

I’m standing at the window when this man at the window nods his head. How are you doing young man? I replied, great!  Do you have any ice-cream sandwiches? Well yes I do,  this is going to be the best sandwich you will ever have,  he smiled at me. I will never forget that wonderful man.

Here is the song. It will bring back your childhood.


A Billion Years Ago

imagesA billion years ago I was walking down to the river to get some water. I had walked for many days through the forest. The insects had been biting me all the way and I stepped on a black snake. I think that it bit me on the foot. I found some ginger root and rubbed it on the bite location. The ancient elders had told me that ginger would draw out the poison from the serpent.

I first came to the waters edge and put my sore foot into the water to cool the pain that I’d been having since the bite. I looked out to the other side of the river and out of the corner of my eye I saw a  pack of wild dogs. One of the dogs looked at me and growled, then all of the other dogs looked up at me. The one dog from the back of the pack started swimming across the river, I could see another one downstream doing the same. I could tell that they were trying to surround me, I would become their meal. I had to advise a plan and real fast as to how I would protect myself. I looked to my right and I could see a large club lying on the ground. I picked up this weapon for defense purposes incase these dogs surrounded me. Looking out to the woods, I could see a large tree and I though that if I scurried a little fast that I might get to the tree and climb up. I turned on my bad foot and made a quick trip, hobbling as I went.

I stood in the crotch of the tree limb for a long time and the wild dogs at the bottom of the tree. They were showing their teeth,  drool was dripping from their mouths. I was going to be their meal if I stepped down from this tree. Finally after the sun went down that the dogs started to disperse. I was getting very hungry and tired. I went back to the waters edge and drank some water and cooled my foot, which was still aching. I crossed the river in search of food. I was walking for quite some time when I could smell an awful odor. I looked up ahead and could see an animal lying on the side of the path. It looked like this might have been left over from the wild dogs. The meat was still pink so I grabbed my stick and poked at it to get some chunks of meat apart. I ate for awhile and then I heard an awful screeching sound. I jumped to my feet real fast and hid behind a bush to try and get a visual of what was coming . Tromp, Tromp, Tromp, I could hear in the forest. Screeeeeeeeech! It brought chills to my spine and all the way down to my toes. I looked up, there before me was a giant bear like creature with large fangs. The paws on the animal were the size of my head and it didn’t look very friendly. I could tell that it had my scent and the only way to get rid of this creature was to start throwing some of the meat that I had gathered from beforehand. This seemed to be working, I kept throwing out pieces of meat, as far as I could throw. My arm was starting to hurt from all the tossing, what the heck is this soft thing lying across my face, why am I laying down on a soft square object, where is my club? What is that beeping sound?

©Bilodeau,D.H. 2014

Muffin’s for Me

untitledAfter a hard nights work I decided to try out the muffin’s that were made the previous night by the bakery down the street. I have driven by this particular bakery with the windows down and the scent is to die for. Every morning when I would come home it was the same old thing. Toast and two eggs, sunny side up, with a half slice of cheese on them. Yes, a delicious breakfast but the aroma from these muffin’s was impregnating my mind. This has to be one of the senses we have no control over. The smell of something that will be etched in your mind forever. I have often thought that once a certain scent has touch the brain it remains forever. The muffin’s are one such item that I will never forget.

There have been times of scent essence that I would not want etched in. For instance around these parts there is a large egg farmer. Every so often a caravan of poop trucks drive down the highway. Not only that this gets etched into your brain, but also your skin, and clothing. One day I was going to an interview for a prospective job. I was in a hurry because I didn’t want to be late. I look up ahead and there they are, the caravan of poop trucks. You could almost see the smell from behind their trucks. So I get to the interview now smelling like chicken poop.

Another instance was when the wife, children, and I were on a summer vacation. We were driving around the beach town looking for some place to eat when we approached a traffic light. The most un-godly smell you have ever smelled was at the intersection. It had to be 90 degree’s out that day and we later learned a fish truck had over turned and its contents along with it.

We can use our sense of smell to our advantage too. You can smell a nice cologne on a person which in some cases be an attractant. It will either drive you crazy or drive you away, one way or another.

I’m going to stick with the smell of muffins today and all other scents will have to wait. Good Day folks- I’m smelling coffee right now.


Dora Dora

2014-02-11 12.59.05A quick trip to pick up the granddaughter this morning. Oh, Just love to see her face when we drive up to her mothers car to get her. My wife and I were up early and traveled to get her. We arrived back at the house and went out to feed the deer. Darn Bluejay’s are stealing the deer feed. Funny, our granddaughter told me the deer feed smells good. Everyone likes the deer feed. I saw Turkey’s nibbling on the feed too. The squirrels seem to like it as well. We made the trip back from the apple tree where we spread some of the deer feed. It was a cold trip this morning but we will get to see deer soon. We are back into the house and stoaked the woodstove so we can have a nice warm house. The granddaughter has set the priorities right off. It will be Dora-Dora-Dora. She just loves watching this show. I cannot understand a single word they are saying because it is all in Spanish. Ok, where are the deer, this will distract her from watching Dora. Come on big critters anytime now. So cold in NewEngland and playing outside with a 5 year old just doesn’t make for a good day when it is this cold.  It has warmed up a little and reading 15 F right now at 1030 hrs. Again I cannot wait for the deer to arrive, this has brought a lot of enjoyment watching them come in for a snack. It is funny how when I do not feed them I will see them out there watching the house. It appears they are just sitting there telling me, Ok, we made the trip and now it is time to feed us. It usually works when I see them all looking my way. I’m going to watch in two directions right now. Doro and the window. Enjoy your day wherever you are.


The Chocolate Hive

imagesUAC48CGNA microscopic overview, an inspection of myself is needed after a day of eating chocolate’s. I have to look back when I was a kid. It seemed like every Christmas I would break out in hives. To this day I wonder if it was the matching plaid pajama’s my twin brother and I received or the chocolate’s placed all over the house.

I have indulged into some chocolate this Valentines day and have checked everything from head to toe. I get a little nervous these days. There is a few spots I cannot reach anymore but a mirror works fine. It makes me realized that I do not have the body I did when I was a little kid. I could twirl my body around like a pretzel. These days I can twirl my body around like a monkey stuck in a tree. Oh! Oh! what the heck is this bump? Just a little mole I guess. That is another object that appears on your body out of nowhere the older you get.

I have learned of one candy that bothers me today. Peppermint Patty’s will put me into automatic sneeze mode every time I have tried them. I do not eat those anymore. I have sneezed on movie goers before.

I will sneak another Valentine candy and before you know it my wife will be without. That is ok, she doesn’t eat candy anyway. It is a strategic move on my part. It is all about the love, right? Oh, did I mention that I do not wear pajama’s to this day. I really do not want to wake up looking like the skittle guy. I’m going to enjoy this calm before the storm. Another snow storm in the Northeast. Enjoy your day folks.

©2014 Bilodeau,D.H.images

Game Day Preparation

imagesThe smell of something good cooking. My spouse and I like to eat something good during the Superbowl. She is cooking up a chili we call Meal-In-One. Lots of beans, kielbasa, sauces, and spices.  Excited to watch the football game here in the USA.

This is a tradition here in the states, lots of good food and usually some company. This year we do not have any company but will sit down and watch the game, just the two of us. The Seattle Seahawks and Denver Bronco’s. Who is going to win? I am a New England Patriots fan but would like to see the Seahawks beat out Manning today of the Bronco’s. It is not very often that I have a day off during the Superbowl but I’m going to enjoy every minute of it tonight. Game time 1830 hours EST. Not sure if I’m going to have any beer but I might have to sip a crown royal just to say I did.

Oh, the smell of the meal-in-one brewing in the crock pot, smells so good. You will have to try this sometime to understand how delicious it really is. Here is the recipe for it.

  1. Saute 2 onions +1 Green Pepper and 1lb of Hamburg
  2. put in crock pot
  3. add 3 cans of beans-1 regular beans, 1 kidney beans, 1 white kidney
  4. add 1 cup ketchup
  5. 1/4 cup Brown Sugar-1/4 cup Vinegar,1 teaspoon worchestershire sauce,
  6. 1-28oz can tomatoes
  7. 1/2 tsp basil,1/2 tsp,oregano,1/2 garlic powder
  8. 1 small can of tomato sauce
  9. 1lb sliced Kielbasa 1/4 inch slices
  10. Cook 4-5 hours on low heat or 6-8 hours on real low.

Enjoy!- you will be the hit of any party. Hoorah go Seahawks.

Sushi For A Maineah? You Kidding Me!

untitledThe famous saying ” you cant get there from he’ah”  is a Maine saying.  I look at Sushi in kind of that same retrospect. You cannot get that here. This is not true because you can get Sushi in Maine. A true home bread Maine resident was never brought up on eating raw fish. The fish we had was a bucket of hornpout or white perch, no tiger trout. We would of never thought to wrap this up in a rice patty and eat it like that. We might put a stick through the gills and roast it on the campfire.

I never could understand why someone would want to eat raw fish when cooking it seems like a better solution. Another thing is that Wasabi stuff you dip the rice cake into. I hear that will kill any bacteria on the fish you are eating. So next time you decide to eat raw fish, make sure to use the Wasabi. It works better than Listerine for killing off the bacteria. Sorry but I’m not eating anything that looks like a pinecone stripped down from a squirrel.imagesOXCBP642

There is something to say about introducing weird suppah’s to us Mainers. We might nod and say we like it. The truth is, we would rather be eating steak and potato’s. I was born and raised on steak and potato’s, no honey I am not going to eat that rice cake stuff rolled in squid. I don’t need diarrhea for a week, the Wasabi is way to hot for me which will give me Hemi’s, and I will take a T-bone for suppah, Thank You.images

Hope Everyone in the Northeast is staying under the radar and stoaking the fire, it is darn cold here. Still nursing this cold, but saw doctor feel good. She gave me a prescription of Sushi and Wasabi. Where is she from anyways? Please give a few comments, love to hear some on the Sushi debate.

© 2014 Bilodeau H.D.