Ketchup Testing Results

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I’ve got to tell you one of my insane cravings that I have had for years. Good ole fashion Ketchup. When I was a young man the kids in the neighborhood would sleep outdoors in sleeping bags right smack on the ground. We had no tents and would swat mosquito’s all night. This one friend of mine would invite us to sleep at his place and his mother would always make a huge breakfast for all the neighborhood kids that were brave enough to sleep outside. The one thing that drove me crazy was the fact that their whole family would put ketchup on their pancakes. Ok, crazy I thought at this very young age and I repeated in my brain the word gross many times. The fact is that these people, my friends, were addicted to ketchup. I thought to myself that never in a million years would I do something as crazy as this.

People can do strange combo’s but this one took the clincher for sure for me. I would never try ketchup on pancakes but I have enjoyed ketchup through the years. I will put ketchup on mashed potatoes, and also on my mac and cheese. I like it on eggs just as much and will sometimes catch myself putting it on a piece of bread. Ok I’m not that bad really but do enjoy the flavor.

The FDICACIA Department has now put Ketchup on the top 100 list of reducing all aging on humans. It has been proven to grow hair in the topical form. Doctors say if you have an erection for more than four hours to go see your nearest doctor. This has been proven with a clinical test performed using fifty men. Other test were done on white lab rats and conclusive results were, not to use white rats again when testing with ketchup. Another test performed was using ketchup as a new tanning application but results show that too many test subjects were getting hives, this test was terminated.

FDIMECIA which is located in Maine has determined that as long as Ketchup is used in moderated doses that it will not cause you to have no teeth.  The next test performed in Maine with Ketchup will be in February 2016. This time half will be female and the other half men. They are looking for any aphrodisiac symptoms in woman this time. The foundation has just come out with ketchup packets and will be dispensing them at your local McDonalds outlets in your community. Stay tuned! Ketchup will now be considered right up there with 5 Hour energy drinks. People are talking about these new finds and  you will hearing a lot more about the health benefits of Ketchup. The only thing they don’t want you using ketchup for is fake blood. Doctors have been fooled in the ER room and don’t want this to be confused with real blood.

Everyone! Get on the Ketchup bandwagon! I’m doing my best to let everyone know.

©Bilodeau,D.H.

 

 

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