I Am A First Responder

untitledI have often thought about my role as a first responder. I’m not a doctor nor a paramedic. I have been in the medical field for more years than most are old. I have made about 2000 dollars in the field for the 30 years I have done service to this community. My face has been at many of accident scenes through the years. I have responded to many high profile incidents and held a hand of someone in need. I sit and wait and I’m on- call, twenty-four-seven at all times. There is many of days that I lay my clothes down in an order as to get up real fast and everything is in order.  Sometimes I wonder what this life of a responder really is. The only people that know how I feel about this is my piers. My family cannot understand, or they try not to understand what it is about me. I cannot help myself, I think I was born to be a responder, put on this earth for a greater reason than even I cannot explain. Every single day I listen to the chatter of incoming calls and wonder when my next call is coming. Is it not that I sit and feel I’m waiting for the next big one? You know how I feel, don’t you? I am a responder in the Fire Service as well. My turnout gear is packed in the truck ready to go at a moments notice. I am also a responder to Hazmat, being a Technician. This is the one response that really scares me. I have never been to an incident yet but I know that when I am called upon I will respond. It really scares me with the fact that WMD is a common word these days and responders have to worry about secondary devices targeted to responders. It is hard being this person I am, but I will respond to any responses that come my way. I have too, I was born to be this person, right?
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